I'm really confused about all of this?

I dont think anyone but you can decide that. Do you still think its inside you, or that it affects you in any way? Thoughts, feelings, memories, or strong emotions of the past.. Or even being totally disconnected and desensitised from what happened.. are all signs that it may still be affecting you. This doesnt mean it is, im just saying they are some signs. Other than that.. if you ever do need to go counselling, you can only go when you feel like you need it. If it affects you or disrupts your life.. otherwise going to counselling at this moment and time may prove to be pointless due to the fact that youve pulled yourself away from it.. mentally and physically. You dont know whether its affecting you or not. Thats what i think anyways.. but on a personal note, amazing.. you are really a strong person, an inspiration for many, and i wish you all the best in your life. Take care, be well and be safe.